On Monday it was time to face the inevitable. Greg had to go to school, followed by track, followed by Ritas while I went to Rita's. After essentially one looong day of speed training it was time for us to work on our own. We were stressed, terrified, and felt completely unqualified. After a terrible night's sleep we were both semi-ready to face the day [ready as in dressed and out of time]. Then the moment that I carry with me every time I leave for work. We had the.best.hug. It was a hug that signified that we really are in this together. A hug that meant more than I love you. A hug that was completely understood as "I know how your feeling". A hug that made me cry out of pure comfort and love. A hug that felt as though time had completely stopped and nothing was going on around us.
I really have no idea how long that hug really lasted. For all I know it could have been 3 seconds [though I'm sure it was longer]. We left at the same time in different cars, headed down the same road. It was though we were even conquering it together. It was in the car as I was trying to compose myself and control my tears, that I realized even though Greg can't be with me and the sense of that hug will rub off, I know that God, my Lord, my Savior, is with me. He will always be there to share every tear, every fear, every frustration and if I give them over to Him I will be free from them. I don't completely remember driving down the highway because I was totally immersed in talking with God.
Giving Him my fears, most definitely my worries & tears, and just asking Him to help me to feel His presence with me that day.
Needless to say, I made it through the day. No more tears, still some fears and worries, but I am going to try to daily give up those worries and fears and someday I know they will be gone.